It makes me sad to think that I never had a chance to meet or speak with my maternal grandfather about his service in the Asiatic Pacific Theater during WWII. I have so many questions I wish I could ask. I wonder what he was feeling when he left the United States on a ship of nervous men headed to the Far East? My grandpa Phil entered the service less than a year after the Fall of the Philippines in 1942. I wonder if he was scared leaving his family behind knowing that close to 2,000 New Mexico soldiers had been forced by the Japanese to march over 60 miles when the Philippines went down? I think he arrived in Manilla, but I need to confirm that. His arrival to the Far East came in 1945, just a few months before the Assault on Luzon (codename S~Day). I am not sure if he was part of that, but I need to find out.
The sacrifices that our soldiers make leave me in awe. It must be mentally taxing to leave your homeland not knowing if you will return. This month I will take time to remember the soldiers who sacrificed for us during the Asiatic Pacific Theater of World War II. Thank you to my grandpa Phil~ the grandpa I never had the chance to meet. He passed away right before I was born.
Timeline of Asiatic Pacific Theater of Operations of World War II
1939~1945~ World War II
1941~1946~ Asiatic Pacific Theater
1941~ December~ Japanese Attacked Pearl Harbor and two sites near Manila, Philippines
1941~1942~ Philippines Campaign (Bataan Peninsula)
1942~ January~ Battle of Bataan Begins (15,000 captured and interned)
1942~ April~ Fall of the Philippines/Bataan Death March 1942~ December~ Date of Induction~ Phil Garcia
1945~ February and March~ Smallpox/Typhoid/Tetanus Immunizations~ Phil Garcia
1945~ August~ Date of Departure~ Asiatic Pacific Theater~ Phil Garcia
1945~ September~Date of Arrival~ Asiatic Pacific Theater~ Phil Garcia
1945~ January~ Assault on Luzon (codename S~Day) 1946~ February~ Phil Garcia crossed the 180º Meridian toward the USA
1946~ February~ Date of Separation~ Phil Garcia
The Lil Men (Daryn and Isaiah) for Easter~ 3.31.2013
I’m resting after a long day of restraint. I don’t know if I’m physically exhausted from being out and about or mentally exhausted from resisting lots of candy and my mom’s frito pies? My aunt kept telling me “but it’s Easter!?” I decided it was better to skip the deep fried chips because the track was closed today. We went by and I was ready to run in the sun, but the locked gates seemed to say “go the heck home!”
We spent the afternoon at a park here in Santa Fe. I grew up playing at that park. It was a beautiful day. The boys had a good ole time running amuck. My sis and I played a basketball game against the two lil men and we lost! When my cousin got there with his two lil girls, I didn’t know what to think!? I’m so not accustomed to frilly/sheer dresses and tights! Haha…. Time for some RnR– hummmm or maybe some cardio!
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What we have done
for ourselves alone dies
with us; what we have
done for others and
the world remains
and is immortal.
~•Albert Pike
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Tonight I attended the services of a well respected member of my home town. Ben Lujan, Sr. was a Democratic member of the New Mexico House of Representatives. He represented his district for decades, and was the current Speaker of the House. To many he was even more than that. He was a father, a brother, a husband, a cousin, and a friend.
I wanted to pay my respects for several reasons. The main reason was for his son~ Ben Ray (or respectfully Congressman Lujan). Not long ago a very good friend of mine passed away in a tragic accident. Ben Ray and my friend Kim were very close when we were young. When she passed away, he made time to attend her services. That act alone~ amongst all of his accomplishments impressed me most. He is worth my respect and so is his family.
One of the most beautiful things I saw tonight was an American flag. The local fire department was flying the flag in Speaker Lujan’s honor. The flag flapped against the cold and dark with a single spotlight on it. It would have been wonderful to see our state flag waving in the wind as well. It was a very touching sight.
When I walked into the Ben Lujan Gymnasium, tonight, the musicians were singing El Shaddai. That was one of Kim’s favorite songs. It seemed so appropriate. Two large photo collages and a video with historic and family photos made me cry. My heart was breaking for another Lujan family as the entire valley gathered to remember a great man. Marcus Cicero once said that “the life of the dead is placed in the memory of the living.” This is so true. He will forever be remembered.
I’m not sure why I ponder my own legacy when I am faced with the passing of those I know? Maybe it is because I am an archivist plagued by the clutches of history and genealogy? Maybe it is because I am highly analytical and contemplative? I do believe that our legacy truly lives on through our family ties.
After seeing all of the touching photos of Ben Sr. it became very clear to me. He was the well respected Speaker of the House, but that defined only a portion of his life. As Mitch Albom once said “death ends a life, not a relationship.” In the end~ it is our family which defines the larger part of who we really are or who we are yet to become.
In the end~ our legacy never stops. The torch is merely carried on by those who we have loved and touched in special ways. A legacy is indeed an immortal flame.
Today I had a pleasant surprise at work. My mom delivered a dozen beautiful roses to me. She also took some to my sister. What a sweet surprise. It was a very nice and unexpected gesture.
~The Christmas lights on the home my mother and father built in the Pojoaque Valley~
It was a beautiful day in the Pojoaque Valley. I can really appreciate my home town now that I am a woman. As usual, I spent time at my mom’s and then my dad’s.
At my mom’s house we decided to skip a gift exchange for the adults. Instead we had an awesome meal. We ate steak, shrimp, scallops, salad, and baked potatoes. Gilbert hooked us up with some crab as well. It was a delicious meal. Before we ate, my ten year old nephew (who is also my God Son) said grace and it brought tears to our eyes.
My dad’s house was filled with the usual sweet treats that Julie and Kate have been making for years. I was so full that I didn’t touch the food. They had made so many things to eat. Even though I did not eat at my dad’s house, I made sure to bring home a bowl of my grandma’s special bread pudding. Yum!
When I was leaving the valley the darkness was settling in. Christmas lights sparkled bright. The color of the sky was just lovely. All of the homes looked so beautiful. I thought about how peaceful my little valley is. This is where I grew up. I do love this place~ it is my home.
I got back to Santa Fe just in time to see the MIA take OKC in the Christmas day game! Yes!! That made the day complete. King James is one step closer to being recrowned in 2013! I guess if it *had* to be, a win by LA mightttt be ok now the Dwight Howard plays for them.
It was a good day. I am ready to get back on track and shake off the holiday lbs.
These are two arrangements I just made. One is for my mother and the other is for my paternal grandmother. I am sure it is a good way to say thank you. I was a floral designer for several years back in the day. I still have fun with it and have done flowers for a handful of weddings, proms, and funerals. These arrangements are simple small tokens of appreciation for two wonderful women in my family.
From left to right: my lil bro Thomas, my grandma Emily, and my brother Brian (retired USAF)
Today I thought about 11s since it is 11.11, but I also took time to think about our veterans. These men and women who are serving and who have served our country are special people. This weekend, my older brother is visiting from Arizona. He recently retired from the United States Air Force. Today I take the time to remember all of the veterans in my family. I also take the time to thank them for my freedom.
Justin was unexpectedly taken from us in a car accident in 2002 here in Santa Fe, New Mexico. I created this movie close to 10 years ago, but tonight I took some time to add a beautiful song by Daughtry titled Gone 2 Soon. In loving memory of a man we lost before we even had a chance to start.
***My Monster- Beats by Dr. Dre Photo Shoot*** Hahahahahahaaaaa
Tonight I will go to bed one year older than I was last year! I don’t know if that should be an exclamation point after that sentence or a sad face – but I do feel like I am getting better with age. I am happy with the woman I have become and I think I am still striving to learn, grow and love. The best story of the day came from my mom. She told me about when I was born. Way back then (haha) it was actually Labor Day on September 1st. My mom said “there was a lot of labor involved that day,” and we both laughed. My mom said she and my dad had to fight through a grip of traffic to get to the hospital. It was fiesta weekend here in Santa Fe and the hospital was downtown near the plaza back then. She remembers that the parade had just started. Apparently there were long lines of traffic. I kinda wonder if she and my dad were thinking that they may have to deliver me in the car? My mom got the killer shot to have me, but before she let that needle into her back, she had to be pinned down by not one but two nurses. I told her “that was the first sign that I was going to be a pain in the ass!” Great story… Anyhow- I got so many wonderful gifts from my family and friends. I do want to take the time to say thank you. I couldn’t believe that 99.9% of my gifts featured symbols which I identify with like bird, feather, and spiral. Amazing!! It was nice to receive: a call from my godmother Rita; HBD texts from my Dad, my friend Britney, and my friend Tammy; and some money from my Mom and Gilbert and my mother-in-law. My most practical gift that I am super psyched about are the Monster Beats by Dr. Dre headphones. Yesssss!! Daryn and Mike hooked me up with them and I must say that I will sleep in those suckers!! Today was a good day. I ate a lot of killer food. Now I am ready to get back on the workout tomorrow with my awesomely black, red, glossy, bass banging, voice recognition havin’, beat ripping headphones! Nice…..
I breathe music!
Like you didn’t know?!
***Monster- Beats by Dr. Dre*** Solo HD featuring Control Talk A Gift from Daryn and Mike on 9.1.2012
***Insert with the Beats Headphones*** This features some of my favorites David Guetta, Lady Gaga, and Lebron James
***Birthday Cards** From Tom, Mom and Laura on 9.1.2012
***Purple Flowers*** A Gift from my Mom on 9.1.2012
***A Notebook and Fancy Purple Pens*** A Gift from Sibel on 8.31.2012
***Measuring Spoon Set with Little Birds*** (birds and feathers are symbols I identify with) A Gift from Gail on 9.1.2012
***Spiral Tunes Wind Chime*** (the spiral is a symbol I identify with) A Gift from Laura, Thomas and Isaiah on 9.1.2012
***Apple Pastry from Cafe Ole*** A Gift from Melissa on 8.31.2012
***Handmade Purple and Silver Spiral Earrings*** (the spiral is a symbol I identify with) A Gift from my Mom on 9.1.2012
Last week I attended the funeral of one of my Valdez cousins in Mora, New Mexico. The day was bitter sweet and the emotional extremes seemed endless. I went to Mora to say my final goodbyes and pay condolences to my Tia Nelly. Funerals there are always beautiful. When I die, maybe I will request that Mora is my final resting place- there on the mountain- close to nature- so that my spirit can be released into endless clouds. That day I took my notebook, pencils, some old notes, my iPod, and a list of things I wanted to do while I was out there with history in mind. I shed many tears that day. I thought about many things. I contemplated what had transpired in the place where many of my maternal ancestors laid their heads. With my list in hand, the Virgo in me neatly checked off each task. The task I will talk about tonight involves one of my many memories of Mora.
Cresencia Valdez’s Old Home in Mora, New Mexico
This memory is tied to my Grandma’s sister, Cresencia. Cresencia went by a few nicknames- Cres, Chencha, Chench, and I liked to call her Chenchi. She passed away several years ago. Chenchi grew up in Mora and passed away in Santa Fe. She had a home in Mora until right before she died. When she moved to Santa Fe as a young woman, she kept the home. She and other family members stayed in the home when they visited Mora. This was usually during the Fiestas. As the years marched on, the home was slowly used less and less, except by us kids. This is one reason that the home was on my list of places to document. When I asked about the home, my mom told me that a cousin from Albuquerque had purchased the home and that all the windows and doors were boarded up. It seemed like it may not be worth a try to take a look at the old home, but I still wanted to go and check it out. The day had grown dark and it was raining.
Cresencia Valdez’s Old Home Mora, New Mexico Rain was moving through when I took this picture.
After the funeral I visited the home. I went in alone… I was lucky that I found a way in! I have to say that it was really scary in there. The house was completely dark except for the light coming in from the opening I found, and the attic window. Ahhhh- the attic– this was where I needed to be. I fought back all my fear of the dark and grasped my love of it. I held my breath and went up the stairs. I couldn’t believe it. It still looked the same. Me and all of my cousins would sneak into the house to play when we were not supposed to. As we got older, we would sneak off from our property after midnight to tell scary stories in that attic. The best memory I have of the attic was becoming a Thriller. That was back when ghetto blasters, and pants with zippers were hot. Looking back, I guess I have always been intrigued with the darker side of things and music. I had a Michael Jackson cassette tape and some nice speakers to ooze the sounds which declared “cause this is Thrilla…” I have to laugh thinking about it now. I was one of the oldest cousins and I remember making all the younger ones play the zombies from the Thriller music video. My cousins would all hide behind things in the attic and would slowly creep out when you heard the “da, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun…” Anyone who has heard that song will know that beat- haha… Who hasn’t heard that song??
Stairs to the Attic- Valdez Home Mora, New Mexico
The Attic- Valdez Home Mora, New Mexico
Window in the Attic- Valdez Home Mora, New Mexico
Those were the times. I love to remember those times. We had a blast back then. I snapped a few pics of the attic after sifting through illusions of laughter and music. I made my way back down the stairs to look around. It was so dark in the rooms that I couldn’t see anything at all. Maybe a chair or two and an old TV. I kept thinking how scary it would be if there was someone in there. The fear got the best of me at one point and I almost turned around and walked out. When I was about to bail, I looked up and saw a wooden cross hanging above the door still. All of the sudden, the fear disintegrated. I took my iPod and tried to use it for light to no avail. Then the most freaky thing happened. Out of the shadows came a real pitbull. No really- a big, huge, bigger than hell pit. Well that did it. My feet had left the building faster than my mind could react! I may have sprinted faster then ever after that happened. What the? Anyhow— I did “run” away with some memories in hand! Now that’s a Thrilla!!!
I had to share one of the most strange things I have learned about in a while. I need to start my story with my brother and his son. This little duo has hunted and fished for just about everything under the sun. When one looks in the dictionary, I would assume the name Thomas must be part of the definition for the word outdoors. Really… This story starts about two summers ago after my brother and his son made a usual trip to a local lake here in New Mexico. I happened to be visiting my sister when these two returned from the trip. My nephew jumped out of the car and was so excited to share the creatures he had in a small plastic container with his cousin (my son Daryn). The container was filled with crawfish. Yes my brother would definitely eat those, but these were intended as pets. Daryn immediately scooped up his very own and we rushed it home. I have been feeding the crawfish small freeze dried shrimp and he has been content with that. He has a sweet home where there is always plenty to eat. Apparently the strange creature likes it here because he is still alive. Last time my brother came over, he was surprised that we still had the little guy. So here is where my story starts. Now on to the rest.
One night after being up very late writing, I made a trip to the kitchen for some water before bed. We have one beta and the crawfish in separate tanks on the kitchen counter. I filled my glass with water and then took a peek into the tanks to see what the fish were up to. I noticed that the crawfish wasn’t moving? Hum? I shook the tank around and looked again. I took a closer look. After a few minutes, I confirmed that the crawfish was not moving. I started to get really sad and have to admit that I grow very close to animals- even the ones that I can’t cuddle. With a tear in my eye, I unscrewed the lid to the tank and started to pour the water down the drain. I planed on taking the small crawfish into the night for a quick burial. Watching the water trickle down the drain I was distracted by the sound. I looked back when I realized that I had been distracted to be sure I had not poured the dead crawfish out. I scanned the round tank. Right at that moment, the crawfish jumped at the glass and scared the hell outta me. What the? But- but- but— there were two? I was completely confused. How could this happen? After taking out the limp body for a closer exam, I figured it was a dead crawfish. The fish was completely intact, but had no eyes?? I put everything down because at this point I was completely freaked by the alien in my house. After a few minutes of feeling kinda scared, I mustered up the courage to go back and check it out. Grabbing a baggie from the cabinet, I got the body and threw it in the fridge. The next day I called my mom and told her what had happened. By this time we had discovered YouTube videos that educated us. It is so strange? These aliens shed their entire exoskeleton so that they can grow. It is funny how we can learn something new everyday. I did decide to look up more information about crawfish after this happened and this is what I found.
My New Mexico Crawfish Exoskeleton
These creatures go by several names like- crawfish, crayfish, lobsters, mudbugs, yabbies, and crawdads. In 2001, Michael B. Sloane, an Aquaculturist with the College of Agriculture at New Mexico State University did some studies on the “warmwater species” crawfish “in New Mexico Aquaculture.” Sloane published a paper which says that “crayfish, or crawdads, are found throughout New Mexico in irrigation ditches, rivers, and ponds.” Alicia Fitzgerald compiled information on the crawdad in 2006 for Pennsylvania State University. Fitzgerald’s research stated that “crayfish (with special reference to genus Cambarus) are extremely distinctive freshwater crustaceans. Their large anterior-most pairs of legs have powerful claws which are efficient tools for defense, food gathering, and object manipulation. Their four pairs of walking legs assist them in rapid locomotion across the bottom substrates of their aquatic habitats. Surprisingly, they are not really capable of swimming although they can use powerful thrusts of their tails to rapidly propel themselves (backwards) through the water.” It was here where I discovered the term moulting. This research says that “crayfish, like all arthropods, have an encasing exoskeleton made out of the structural polysaccharide chitin. For a crayfish to grow, it must shed its exoskeleton and then re-grow a new and larger one.”
My New Mexico Crawish in Action
It is amazing what I witnessed in my kitchen that night. I would have never known that for over a year, I have shared a home with a local alien unless he shed his skin! Now that’s some freaky stuff!! See for yourself. Below there are two YouTube videos. The first is titled “Crayfish in Blue Hole New Mexico,” and the second is titled “Blue Crayfish Moulting.” I hope you can sleep after that! Creepy!!!!! Haha…
*****Ancestral Puebloan***** 19 x 25 inch colored pencil and ink drawing created by Felicia Lujan in about 1993.
A couple of weeks ago, my mom called me and told me that she had a couple of things to give me. She had come across an old colored pencil/ink drawing I created almost 20 years ago, and she also had the video footage of my college graduation. Of course I told her I wanted both back. Last weekend I watched the video footage. It was fun to watch in retrospect, but what was most important was a tiny piece of footage unrelated to my graduation. It was footage of my grandmother (now deceased) right at the beginning. I could have gone without the hour long video of me smiling and making funny faces at the camera for less than a minute of footage of my grandma. There were a few people in the shot, and I was apparently standing off to the side. My grandma Corine urged me to get in the frame. I cried when I heard her say my name in her cute little voice. After I watched the video, I stayed looking at my old, oversized artwork. It is rather mind blowing that I penciled this Ancestral Puebloan almost two decades ago way before I cared about my family history. I made the picture for my mother so many years before and had it framed for her. Ironically, I got my picture back from my mother, with a moving image of her mother, and my direct maternal DNA is tied to Native ancestry. Thinking back, I don’t remember why I selected that particular subject matter for the colored pencil/ink drawing? What matters now is the connection between each item and the subject matter, as well as how I feel about it. Everything happens for a reason. It was time for those two pieces of history from my maternal line to return to me.
*****Ancestral Puebloan***** Framed 19 x 25 inch colored pencil and ink drawing created by Felicia Lujan in about 1993.
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Ancestral Puebloan Cry
Earthen paths of directions lost,
link me to the strand of time.
Guide steps through knowledge gates
so I connect each dot to line.
Untie my hands to feel the past.
Tie what’s inside me to the stars.
Draw water from this flowing
stream and teach me of your wars.
I am bound by fire. Ancestor I
will endure and live another day.
Reveal the path, I’ll hear your cry
and bless your body where it lay.
Forge the sky to feed my heart,
which beats with Native drum.
Whisper to me on the wind–
where is my mother from?
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On Friday, June 15, I attended a lecture to learn more about the Celt-Iberians and my yDNA (paternal). The lecture was in Santa Fe, New Mexico, and was held in conjunction with the 2012 Genealogical Society of Hispanic America Conference. I was thankful to Kathy Archuleta for allowing me to attend, and I will need to remember to call her and thank her personally.
The presenter started off by playing Spanish Celtic music which featured a Spanish bagpipe or Gaita. The artist was José Ángel Hevia Velasco, known professionally as Hevia. The majority of the presentation focused on a documentary about the Celts in Europe. The Celtic tribes were called “a great civilization” and the documentary featured ancient “galleries of rock art” which were used for rituals. The rock art depicted dwellings, hunting scenes, and tribal warriors with “exaggerated phallic displays.” An interesting archaeological excavation uncovered over 150 iron swords, spearheads, and daggers from the Lake Neuchatel site (La Tene, Switzerland).
Other archaeological discoveries included: royal tombs; Celtic art such as beautiful and intricate gold jewelry; plates with swirling patters and motifs; head dresses; gold vases; mirrors; bronze shields; and imagery of part animal/part human creatures. Some of the art work was called “nightmarish,” and was just my style. I am apparently a Spanish Celt at heart!! The artworks featured monsters, and there was one piece with a human head in a monster’s mouth. The commentator of this documentary said that this was “the art of the elite,” and that it “expresses authority.”
We learned about how the Celtic tribes plundered the Greeks, and the Gods were said to have intervened at the sacred site of Delphi. That is why I wrote about the Oracle last night. I learned that the Iberian Peninsula has been a problem for scholars for several reasons. Some of the ancient structures built by the Celts included: pit traps; defensive towers; circular dwellings; and hill forts for protection (many of which go back to the Bronze Age). We learned some about migration from the documentary, though there is apparently no evidence of mass immigration. I saw the first written record of land ownership carved in stone.
I love that warfare was an intrinsic part of Celtic life. I may write at some point about the carnyx, which was made of bronze, and was the Celtic “instrument of war.” The instrument made an eerie sound, known by all as a warning. One scholar interviewed in the documentary said that the Celts “made great slaughter and decapitated enemies.” They had “the ability to kill and kill and great numbers,” and were “a powerful and organized society.” I would also like to learn more about the torc, as a symbol of authority. This was an open-ended ring of metal worn around the neck.
A couple of interesting thoughts I came away with…
I must get some traits from my ancient forefathers. I was glad to learn that art and music were very important to the ancient Celtic tribes. I had never thought about this until Friday, but for years people from outside of New Mexico have asked if I was from Europe. Many people have asked if I was Scottish or Irish. Yeah I know— New Mexicans– strange ha? I have always thought it was funny, but as it turns out, maybe my tongue actually makes sounds indicative of an ancient Celtic nation? Apparently, “during the 1st millennium BC,” Celtic languages “were spoken across Europe,” and “in the Iberian Peninsula.” Hum? Another thought was how very appropriate it was that I was learning about my yDNA just a couple of days before Father’s Day!
Composite of the three pages from Rio Grande Family Magazine (cover, pg9,pg10)
Chris’s Yummy Cake
Chris and His Lady
Collage made by my Aunt Mary for her son Chris.
The Vigils- Chris’s parents and his brothers Marcus and Toby with their families.
Yesterday I attended a graduation party for my cousin Chris Vigil. It was a busy day. I got up early in the morning and made a huge red enchilada to take over. Chris is a remarkable young man. He is a math whiz, he is athletic and plays basketball, and now he can add “Head of the Class” to his list of accomplishments. I am so proud of Chris, and all of my Aunt Mary’s sons. Mary is my mom’s youngest sister, and she is my right hand woman! My aunt’s sons- Chris, Marcus and Toby are all doing so well. They are handsome and respectful. My Aunt Mary and My Uncle Toby have done a fine job raising good men. I must say that I was ecstatic to see an athlete make “Head of Class” as a Sterling Silver. This is one thing I love to harp on, and that is the fact that a person can be good looking, athletic and intelligent. Chris is an excellent example, as he made top 15 of 200+ in his graduating class. His party was fun. They had a live band, lots of food, and some **killer** cupcakes (ohhhh yes I licked that frosting off with the quickness cuz it was Saturday !!). You know my Aunt Juana got the party started with some hard core boot stompin’- she is 2 much! It is always great to celebrate accomplishments together. Following is part of an article that featured my cousin in the May 2012 issue of Rio Grande Family Magazine. We are all so proud of lil Chris. I believe he is my last 1st cousin on my maternal side that will graduate from high school. Good job Chris!
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HEAD OF CLASS – 2012
By Vickie Fellows, Blue Sky Images
As area high school seniors prepare for their future endeavors, we take a moment to recognize their many accomplishments. This page celebrates Santa Fe’s Capital High School Sterling Silvers. These students exemplify excellence in academics, character and service. As you read the criteria for being selected into the Sterling Silvers, you will see why these students represent the best of the best.
• Student must be currently classified as a graduating senior.
• Student must have a minimum 3.25 cumulative grade point average.
• Student cannot have any grade of D or F on their transcript.
• Student must have been a student at Capital High School for at least two years.
• Students must have a minimum of 3 teacher recommendations.
• Students will be required to submit an essay, scored by an English teacher.
• Students must participate in an interview with the Sterling Silvers Committee.
• Students may not have any Level 3 violations of the Code of Conduct while at CHS.
• Over the course of four years, students must have been involved or be currently involved in at least one club, or co-curricular/extra curricular activities.
Please join us in congratulating these accomplished young men and women. Truly, they are at the Head of the Class.
It has been a long, long, long time since I have had a chance to get together with my girlfriends. The last time we saw each other was not long ago for the funeral of our very good friend. We graduated almost two decades ago, and we have lost a few of our classmates since then. Before our friend Kim passed away, she was insisting that “the girls” have a mini reunion. I am really sad that we never acted on those plans. The reunion was tentatively planned, unfortunately, we never had the opportunity to meet. After her funeral, we all said that it would be very important that we get together. On Friday, we had several tangent conversations about loss. We talked about the loss of those we have loved.
Autumn was the first to take a firm stand for our meeting. She wanted us to meet at Coyote Cafe on Water Street because her brother Quinn Stephenson is a master mixologist, and part owner of the cafe. I can still remember Quinn as a young boy, who Autumn was always teasing, so it was interesting to think that he may well be one of the most famous creative forces when it comes to liquor. I was only able to go for a little while on Friday, but my friend Ang had some fun teasing me about how much I would have loved the drink she had. Quinn created some sort of martini with pop rocks candy on the rim. Ang was laughing about how much I love candy, and in my voice she said “you had me at pop rocks!” We laughed our asses off about my undying love of candy.
Anna, Angela, Autumn and Felicia at Coyote Cafe in Santa Fe, New Mexico on May 18, 2012.
We often become lost in our own busy worlds and tend to forget that some of the best years of our worlds were made of friendship. This time we were able to get together and share memories. Of course there is always someone missing, but it was nice to see some of the women who made such an impact on my life when I was young, and basically helped forge my path to womanhood. Today and yesterday- things change, but somehow they still stay the same. The second Autumn got there, she whipped out an old photo that she had apparently taken of us drinking home made jungle juice by the river on Senior Ditch Day in 1993. We had a ton of laughs about that photo. There was Kim with her trademark smile. She was one of our friends missing from the table that night.
So what changed and what stayed the same? We talked about our kids. Anna with two boys, Ang with one daughter, Autumn with two girls, and me with Daryn. We talked about the challenges of parenting, and ways that we can cope like exercise. I was so glad to see that Anna had made a return to her roots by undertaking long distance running again. On Saturday she participated in a 14 mile half marathon in the mountains of Los Alamos. She said her sisters were a bit worried about the distance- but this woman could literally breathe miles back in the day. Ang and I were, and still are the sprinters of the bunch- preferring to run short, fast, and hard. One thing was clear– that was that we needed exercise as an outlet. I had ordered an iced tea (yes even the temptations from a mixologist are no match for me these days- I often feel like drinking, but don’t). Anna ordered a virgin mojito, and I told her “you are in training.” She said “exactly!” I wonder how she did on the marathon?
Kim, Felicia, Therese, Anna, Angela and Jenny at Pojoaque High School’s Senior Ditch Day in 1993. We were seniors that year. This is the photograph that Autumn wanted to show us.
Then there was Ang with her super smarts- I called her “the hot nerd.” I love hot nerds! She was an ace in the classroom and she is still an ace working with engineers and cranking out work in GIS. We all laughed when Autumn talked about how she would be analyzed during a conference on Saturday by her fellow masters of the mind. She is a therapist, and I am sure she is really good at what she does. After all these years- I know she is one to listen, not just hear. Before I left she leaned into me and told me that she still has poems I wrote when we were in school. Not even I have those poems??!! I’m curious! Autumn still had some of Ang’s artwork. Maybe Autumn should have been an archivist like me? One day I will need to see her mini archive, as I am likely to feel the love that she carries with her in her heart.
At first I was a bit nervous to see everyone face to face. What would I say? What would it be like? It had been almost 20 years! Weird that I would be nervous, but it makes complete sense. In this technological hailstorm which feeds us the illusion of connectivity in a truly disconnected world, we fear intimate exchanges. I am so glad that I met them- even if it was just for a short time. Really- it was like we had seen each other just yesterday. Time melted away into the Santa Fe sunset, and all that was left were our coyote smiles, laughter, and our treasured memories.
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Silently, one by one, in
the infinite meadows of
the heaven, blossomed
the lovely stars, the
forget-me-nots of the
angels.
— Henry W. Longfellow
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A way to put my thoughts into words... May be I am just talking to myself...may be aloud...These are my thoughts in a poetic form, which are very much a part of me and which makes me what I am...
– but I do feel like I am getting better with age. I am happy with the woman I have become and I think I am still striving to learn, grow and love. The best story of the day came from my mom. She told me about when I was born. Way back then (haha) it was actually Labor Day on September 1st. My mom said “there was a lot of labor involved that day,” and we both laughed. My mom said she and my dad had to fight through a grip of traffic to get to the hospital. It was fiesta weekend here in Santa Fe and the hospital was downtown near the plaza back then. She remembers that the parade had just started. Apparently there were long lines of traffic. I kinda wonder if she and my dad were thinking that they may have to deliver me in the car? My mom got the killer shot to have me, but before she let that needle into her back, she had to be pinned down by not one but two nurses. I told her “that was the first sign that I was going to be a pain in the ass!” Great story… Anyhow- I got so many wonderful gifts from my family and friends. I do want to take the time to say thank you. I couldn’t believe that 99.9% of my gifts featured symbols which I identify with like bird, feather, and spiral. Amazing!! It was nice to receive: a call from my godmother Rita; HBD texts from my Dad, my friend Britney, and my friend Tammy; and some money from my Mom and Gilbert and my mother-in-law. My most practical gift that I am super psyched about are the Monster Beats by Dr. Dre headphones. Yesssss!! Daryn and Mike hooked me up with them and I must say that I will sleep in those suckers!! Today was a good day. I ate a lot of killer food. Now I am ready to get back on the workout tomorrow with my awesomely black, red, glossy, bass banging, voice recognition havin’, beat ripping headphones! Nice…..
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