The Unreal Perfectionist

Last night when I got home from work, I was inundated with Beyoncé news just like the rest of the world. At first, I thought about how the media turns anything into news and makes something small into a national scandal. What a waste of time, money, and air waves! I will say that I am a Beyoncé fan, still I was a bit disappointed in her decision.

After my initial thoughts about the music and pop culture anthem fiasco, I was left feeling rather sad for B. Frankly I could care less if the woman moves her lips to the music. The real story here is not that she faked the performance, but rather why she faked it. By now we all know the story is most likely true because a gazillion people have combed through her footage and photos looking for clues. Again an utter waste! If we look deeper than well trained lips, why did she really do it?

Humans are in a constant fight in the illusive quest for perfection. There is so much pressure not only for the rich and famous to be perfect, but even for us normal folks. Since “perfect” is basically an impossible goal, we are doomed to failure. Honestly I didn’t even care to research the excuses B would likely give for the facade. If her voice cracked, if her tongue had frost bite— it would have all been news right? So who really cares? Her performance would have been just as beautiful with any of the glitches.

It drives me nuts that we are slowly being consumed by plastic. Why do we need to have perfect voices, perfect bodies, perfect hair, perfect partners, perfect friends, perfect jobs, and perfect lives? Is there no one out there who still believes that flaws, scars, tears, and mistakes can be beautiful? Imperfection should not be a crutch. It is just a confirmation of the human condition. Until we can accept that we will never be perfect no matter how hard we try, we will never find true happiness.

I do feel rather sad for Beyoncé. Who cares what people think? No one will stop buying her music. No one will stop thinking she is beautiful on the outside. I wonder if the perfectionist is really happy though? Does she have inner beauty? She is such a lovely woman. If only she could see that. In the end, her quest for perfectionism could crucify her happiness. B will risk becoming yet another needless casualty in a world of plastic.

All Grown Up

Lil Corine Garcia in the 90s

Congratulations to my cousin
Corine Garcia. She has been
working toward a degree in
Albuquerque, and it is time
to acknowledge her success
and tenacity. It seems like just
yesterday that she was
rockin’ her lil fly bike at
grandma’s house! I am very
proud of her. Unfortunately
I missed her celebration this
weekend while I was out of
state, so I wanted to take the
time to tell her how awesome
I think she is! Keep up the
good work woman!

~~Love- Felish

One for the Twins

•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my
brother and sister. I love
you both very much!!!

•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•

Because time itself is like a
spiral, something special
happens on your birthday
each year. The same energy
that God invested in you at
birth is present once again. 
~Menachem Schneerson

~Felicia holding her baby brother and sister~ Thomas and Laura (The Twins) in March of 1980~

~The birthday cake with Orchids I made for Shnoop n Loop~

~ToOoo Many Candles~

~Isaiah, Thomas and Laura listen as we sing Happy Birthday~

~The Twinny Twinz~

A Birthday, Baseball and Heels

Marilyn Monroe Plays Baseball

Today is Marilyn Monroe’s Birthday. She was born on June 1, 1926 in Los Angeles, California, and died on August 5, 1962 in Los Angeles, California. There was not even a week separating the birthdays of she and her beloved Mr. President. Maybe tonight they will have a drink together in which ever realm accepted them…. Her last public appearance was at Dodger Stadium on June 1, 1962.

Happy Birthday Mz. Monroe—

Happy 95th Mr. President with Love Mz. Monroe

*****Happy 95th Mr. President with Love Mz. Monroe*****
Digital composite by Felicia Lujan. Composite includes: two
historic photographs (Mr. President and Mz. Monroe); and
three contemporary images (smoke, a cupcake, and a candle).

May 29, 2012, would have
been President John F. Kennedy’s
95th birthday. The United States Military held an
official wreath laying ceremony in his honor at
Arlington National Cemetery. A wreath was
placed at his graveside near the JFK Eternal Flame
(I love that it’s “eternal” ). The Eternal Flame
is the permanent presidential memorial.
President John F. Kennedy was assassinated
on November 22, 1963. The National Archives
and Records Administration has also released
commemorative footage of Mr. President, which
is available through a Creative Commons license
and is now in the public domain. The film is titled
John F. Kennedy: 1,000 Days.
It is an archival documentary from the United States
Information Agency, which celebrates
JFK’s time in office from 1961-1963.

A Sterling Silver in Santa Fe

Composite of the three pages from Rio Grande Family Magazine (cover, pg9,pg10)

Chris’s Yummy Cake

Chris and His Lady

Collage made by my Aunt Mary for her son Chris.

The Vigils- Chris’s parents and his brothers Marcus and Toby with their families.

Yesterday I attended a graduation party for my cousin Chris Vigil. It was a busy day. I got up early in the morning and made a huge red enchilada to take over. Chris is a remarkable young man. He is a math whiz, he is athletic and plays basketball, and now he can add “Head of the Class” to his list of accomplishments. I am so proud of Chris, and all of my Aunt Mary’s sons. Mary is my mom’s youngest sister, and she is my right hand woman! My aunt’s sons- Chris, Marcus and Toby are all doing so well. They are handsome and respectful. My Aunt Mary and My Uncle Toby have done a fine job raising good men. I must say that I was ecstatic to see an athlete make “Head of Class” as a Sterling Silver. This is one thing I love to harp on, and that is the fact that a person can be good looking, athletic and intelligent. Chris is an excellent example, as he made top 15 of 200+ in his graduating class. His party was fun. They had a live band, lots of food, and some **killer** cupcakes (ohhhh yes I licked that frosting off with the quickness cuz it was Saturday !!). You know my Aunt Juana got the party started with some hard core boot stompin’- she is 2 much! It is always great to celebrate accomplishments together. Following is part of an article that featured my cousin in the May 2012 issue of Rio Grande Family Magazine. We are all so proud of lil Chris. I believe he is my last 1^st cousin on my maternal side that will graduate from high school. Good job Chris!

______________________________________________

HEAD OF CLASS – 2012

By Vickie Fellows, Blue Sky Images

As area high school seniors prepare for their future endeavors, we take a moment to recognize their many accomplishments. This page celebrates Santa Fe’s Capital High School Sterling Silvers. These students exemplify excellence in academics, character and service. As you read the criteria for being selected into the Sterling Silvers, you will see why these students represent the best of the best.

• Student must be currently classified as a graduating senior.

• Student must have a minimum 3.25 cumulative grade point average.

• Student cannot have any grade of D or F on their transcript.

• Student must have been a student at Capital High School for at least two years.

• Students must have a minimum of 3 teacher recommendations.

• Students will be required to submit an essay, scored by an English teacher.

• Students must participate in an interview with the Sterling Silvers Committee.

• Students may not have any Level 3 violations of the Code of Conduct while at CHS.

• Over the course of four years, students must have been involved or be currently involved in at least one club, or co-curricular/extra curricular activities.

Please join us in congratulating these accomplished young men and women. Truly, they are at the Head of the Class.

Stars, History and Romance: Flicks in the Dark

Stars, History and Romance: Flicks in the Dark

Now this is my idea of fun……  

———————-

***Outdoor film shorts to celebrate the New Mexico Centennial***

 

This event will be at the Gutierrez-Hubbell House in Albuquerque, New Mexico on June 2, 2012 from 8:00pm-10:00pm.

 

Bring a blanket and picnic and join us under the stars to partake in the screening of these local films that speak to the rich history and culture of New Mexico:

 

“Land Water People Time”, “On the Other Side of the Fence”, and “Within Me”

 

For more information visit —– http://www.dukecityfix.com/events/outdoor-film-shorts-for-new-mexico-s-centennial-celebration-1

Chocolate: A Historic Look at the Cliché

A cliché but good image of Montezuma, and what the right amount of chocolate may have done to him.

This weekend I watched two specials on Food Network that were all about chocolate. Apparently my two favorites Giada De Laurentiis and Sandra Lee were celebrating the big V with truck loads of the stuff. Who knew you could fry up beef cubes, and dip them in chocolate fondue? Really? Yuck! I gotta say I will skip Sandra’s recipe for that. Of course Giada is almost always flawless in her explorations of tasteful Italian treats. Sandra Lee did say something that set my mind on “wonder.” She mentioned a few things about the history of chocolate. Now that’s what I like to hear! While preparing one of her dishes, Lee said that an Aztec would drink a cup of chocolate before heading off to be with his harem and she giggled a bit about it. Well- you know I wanted to learn more right? I assumed the foodie was referring to Montezuma (or Moctezuma) but wanted to do some fact checking. What fun this offered! A chance to break from the monotony of red roses and velvet boxes… I mean who isn’t sick of the overdone heart box filled with sad little chocolates? Here is what I found.

I would assume that only dark chocolate could have had any sort of positive mental and physical affect on one man in the presence of a harem. Milk chocolate, and too much of any other chocolate would only make one feel sluggish and chubby! On April 29, 2011, Live Strong (my favorite) published Dark Chocolate and the Human Brain by Beth Greenwood. The author took a contemporary look at the benefits of the dark stuff, which is “made from the dried, fermented meat of the cacao bean.” Greenwood says that chocolate contains “more than 300 chemicals.” Of course, caffeine is one of the best . This author also provided the research of a PhD who “found that flavanols in cocoa — also contained in dark chocolate — increased activity in specific areas of the brain through dilation of blood vessels.”

In 2000, the Journal of Nutrition published Food of the Gods: Cure for Humanity? A Cultural History of the Medicinal and Ritual Use of Chocolate. The research paper was put forth by six individuals for the American Society for Nutritional Sciences (Dillinger, Barriga, Escárcega, Jimenez, Salazar and Grivetti). This team explored “the medicinal use of cacao, or chocolate, both as a primary remedy and as a vehicle to deliver other medicines.” The research concluded the uses of chocolate “originated in the New World and diffused to Europe in the mid 1500s. These practices originated among the Olmec, Maya and Mexica (Aztec).” The paper discusses a creation story in which the Plumed Serpent God of the Aztec named Quetzalcoatl, “discovered cacao in a mountain filled with other plant foods.” This research paper goes on to say that “before initial European–Mexica contact in 1519, cacao was prepared only as a beverage and was a food reserved for adult males, specifically, priests, highest government officials, military officers, distinguished warriors and occasionally sacrificial victims for ritual purposes. This age/gender/status differentiation was imposed because the Mexica perceived cacao to be an intoxicating food, and therefore unsuitable for women and children, as well as a very valuable and prestigious food, and thus reserved for nobility.” Now how was that fair? What the? If Montezuma knew that women are the primary consumers of chocolate on the big V, he would likely die another death in his golden afterlife!

Most interesting of all, the team uncovered a manuscript providing some information on an encounter with the historical chocolate consumers. The manuscript recorded the following:

*****”from time to time the men of Montezuma’s guard brought him, in cups of pure gold a drink made from the cocoa-plant, which they said he took before visiting his wives. We did not take much notice of this at the time, though I saw them bring in a good fifty large jugs of chocolate, all frothed up, of which he would drink a little. As soon as the great Montezuma had dined, all the guards and many more of his household servants ate in their turn. I think more than a thousand plates of food must have been brought in for them, and more than two thousand jugs of chocolate frothed up in the Mexican style.”*****

Hummm? Would he really just “drink a little” of a Mexican mocha?? Is that possible? After eating and drinking like that, could Montezuma really satisfy a harem? I don’t know Sandra!!? Highly unlikely don’tcha think? Hahaha…

11*****Posted using WordPress for BlackBerry*****11

Fried Food Is Evil…What the??

Evil French Fries- Digital composite by Felicia Lujan includes 11 digital images.

Why is it that special events like the Super Bowl turn us into ravaged, red eyed, snacking beasts? The bowl can actually be a little less than super after all the rubbish. This year, my excuses to eat junk started well before 5:00pm on Friday. I usually wait until after that time to have a Friday night melt down, and I paid greatly for that decision. By Sunday morning I was the Exorcist to the 5^th power! All that junk had me lazy and super moody. I slept really late on Sunday. I stayed in bed until 11:00am, and frankly, I didn’t really feel the need to move at all. I forced myself to get up. I was being such a bum that I decided to completely skip cardio, and even sat in the car while Mike attempted to train Daryn at the park! What the?? That is unheard of for as many Sundays as far back as I can remember.

So where should I start? Ahhh yes— the queso (cheese dip)… How could I possibly miss out on that? By Friday at lunch, we had received word that the deputy of my agency had whipped up a batch of the goods (of course in honor of the Super Bowl what else?). The second those words hit my ears, I decided that I would chalk it all up for the day- and apparently the weekend! I had to do a last minute tour at my work and by that time what was the point of working out? Instead I ran off to Trader Joe’s for an unhealthy salad, which I swallowed down- as well as several bags of random health snacks (which are actually really bad for you in excess). Between Trader Joe’s and the drive back to my work, I had eaten: freeze dried banana chips; deep fried fake tater sticks; one vegan chocolate chip cookie; and salted/dried green beans in addition to that salad. Yikes! That’s like a five minute drive… What the?? Needless to say the eating of junk and fried food had put me on a focused mission.

After work we hit up the old, but new Real Burger across from my work. There I had a BLT (yes fried bacon, but it was on whole wheat bread and did have lettuce so what’s not healthy?). I also ate real potato french fries. That night, I went to bed after watching my show. The next day, we went to Java Joe’s for breakfast. What the?? We never do that. There I had my regular breve, a white flour, green chili and cheese croissant, and half of a scone. I didn’t really eat lunch, but after that we went to Albuquerque. There we went to the Elephant Bar and what did I get? You guessed it… More fried food! I got fried shrimp. I had ordered sweet potato french fries and they messed up my order, so they brought me out more fries. Yeah— I ate each and every one. Disgusting! I couldn’t figure out why I was in such a bad mood yesterday? After I got back on my regularly scheduled program today, ate right, and hit the gym with a vengeance my smile was back! I felt 101% better. Really…

When am I gonna learn? Fried food and junk is straight poison- not just for my body, but for my mind… Evil… evil…. evil fries! You don’t just have to take my word for it. These horrible foods will take hold of your mood and energy levels. Ask New Mexico’s own Dr. Barry Ramo, or ask Dr. Oz. For that matter, look up the research of Dr. Richard Wurtman of MIT. He has done several studies on how certain foods have a negative affect on neurotransmitters. Yes- there is science behind the unexplained tongue lashing and eye rolling. You can also refer to a recent Psychology Today article titled Nature’s Bounty: The Far Reach of Fast Food by Hara Marano. Here Marano says that according to Toronto researchers, “the data trove” she has uncovered “doesn’t even hint at a larger issue.” This issue is “the behavioral impact fast food has on us…” The author of this article goes as far as saying that these foods “may be undermining happiness as well.”

In looking into this tonight, I discovered a book that I would like to buy. The book is by a New York Times Best Selling Author and Health Journalist and is titled The Secrets of People Who Never Get Sick: What They Know, Why It Works, and How It Can Work for You. I checked out some pages of this book on Google Books, and Dr. Mark Hyman seems to have put forth a well researched resource. So in the end- you don’t have to take my word for it, check it all out for yourself. Next time you are feeling a bit evil, try and remember what it is you may have consumed to make you feel that way. Once you pinpoint the culprits (there will likely be more than one)- get in a good workout, burn it off, and start smiling again!

Further Resources:
The Secrets of People Who Never Get Sick: What They Know, Why It Works, and How It Can Work for You by Dr. Mark Hyman- http://secretsofpeople.com/

Secrets to Staying Healthy- Gene Stone & Dr. Tony Japour Offer Some Healthy Hints- http://abcnews.go.com/Health/video/secrets-staying-healthy-never-get-sick-hints-advice-gene-stone-tony-japour-health-12584662

Nature’s Bounty: The Far Reach of Fast Food by Hara Estroff Marano- http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/201009/natures-bounty-the-far-reach-fast-food

An Aphotic Look at History: New Mexico Turns 100

Mirage

*****
I saw a bluish-green lake,
With a yellow sandy beach.
Tall green cat-tails
With brown tops
Grew in the shallow water
Along the shore.
Then, as by magic,
The lake and all pertaining to it
Faded before my wondering gaze.
There remained Sandia Mountain,
Clothed by gray rocks
And tall green pines.
*****
And so, our worst troubles
Fade into nothingness,
Because they are no more real
Than the mirage that I seemed to see,
Where in reality there were
Rocks of Truth,
And tall trees pointing to God.
*****
No.10- Poems of New Mexico
by Roy A. Keech
Santa Fe, Seton Village Press, 1941

As an archivist, in the vast magnitude of history tied to my homeland, 100 years seems miniscule to me. With that said, the last 100 years has been very important within the breadth of our collective memory of state government. A century ago today, the State of New Mexico was formally birthed into the Union. The quest for statehood was a struggle. To explain the struggle, one could branch off into an entirely separate piece. As the Dark Archivist, I wanted to highlight some hidden history. I wondered what the local news headlines were like on the day New Mexico was admitted into the Union. There were likely many articles on the 7^th, but since I have a strong interest in numerology, I intentionally checked the newspaper from the 6^th. After looking through the Santa Fe New Mexican from January 6, 1912, two things caught my eye. The first was an article about a fatal train wreck in Kansas, and the second was a thank you advertisement from a local pharmacy on the Santa Fe Plaza.

Two days before New Mexico became a state, the perigee of the moon was the closest it would be to the earth for hundreds of years- some say from 1750 thru 2125. “On that day the full moon around the world was 25% brighter than average.” We all know what they say about a full moon, and the week of a full moon, so I wasn’t surprised to find information on a fatal train wreck in the Santa Fe New Mexican on January 6, 1912. The headline reads “Fatal Wreck of Santa Fe- A Rear End Collision in Blinding Snow at Wright, Kansas.” Most people familiar with New Mexico history are aware that the Santa Fe Trail ran from Missouri into the heart Santa Fe. The trail connected Santa Fe and Kansas. Two people were killed in this train accident. With my interest in numerology, I found it strange that the day New Mexico became a state in 1912, 12 people were injured in this accident, and the train was No.12. Apparently, “Engineer C.C. Deming, of Santa Fe passenger train No.12” was “unable to see the station lights in the blinding snow storm.” The Emporia, a Kansas newspaper also published an article about the accident. Another article on that page of the Kansas newspaper said that it had been “the coldest night in Kansas since 1905,” and that “the mercury, which had been on the downgrade “when its high mark was 12 degrees above zero, passed the zero point at dusk.”

Then there was the second interesting thing my eyes were drawn to in the January 6, 1912 Santa Fe New Mexican. This was a thank you advertisement from a local pharmacy on the Santa Fe Plaza. The advertisement was published by the pharmacy owners thanking patrons and sending warm wishes for the New Year. The ad was run by the owner of Zook’s Pharmacy. This pharmacy was a known safe house for a Soviet agent who plotted to assassinate Leon Trotsky in the 40s. I learned a bit more about the local pharmacy, and the owners at a recent presentation of E.B. Held. Held is an author, and a retired Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) Agent/Clandestine Operations Officer. He has also been the Director of Intelligence at Sandia National Laboratory here in New Mexico, and he is the current Director of Intelligence and Counterintelligence at the Department of Energy in Washington, D.C. Held recently published A Spy’s Guide to Santa Fe and Albuquerque, which is a history of espionage in New Mexico. In my post on 11.11.11, titled Adventure of Agent No.11: Intelligence is Never Perfect, I gave more information about Held. I didn’t expect to see this ad tied to New Mexico’s birthday, but apparently brain waves and coincidences can be funny things…

New Mexican File Photo_1.24.2011

What was going on outside of New Mexico in January 1912?

*****The January issue of National Geographic Magazine published “Our Immigration Laws from the View-Point of National Eugenics.” The paper was written by Professor Robert De.C Ward of Harvard University. The research was aimed at “ethnic cleansing,” and the “power to pick out the best specimens of each race to be the parents of” future citizens. *****Hummm? Eugenics- I would hope many minds have evolved over the last century in regard to “controlled breeding.”

*****Sigmund Freud (Austrian neurologist and founder of psychoanalysis) and C.G. Jung (Swiss psychiatrist and founder of analytical psychology) were corresponding. On the 9^th, Jung writes to Freud from Switzerland and discusses a paper on symbolism in dreams, and the language of dreams. On the 10^th, Freud sends a letter to Jung. He was “racking” his “brains” in Vienna the capital of the Republic of Austria. Freud suggests that Jung “show more reserve towards” his patient because “what the poor thing wants most is an intellectual flirtati (Italian form of the word flirt). *****Ooooo… I learned a new word.

*****On the 23^rd, “the International Opium Convention was signed in the Hague by representatives from China, France, Germany, Italy, Japan, the Netherlands, Persia, Portugal, Russia, Thailand, and the UK.” There were six chapters and twenty five articles. The convention “contained many elements of a comprehensive drug control treaty.” *****This is interesting to me because close to 50 years before this convention, our of our governors met an ill fate. Governor Henry Connelly died of an Opium overdose about a month after leaving office. Even curiouser, Connelly had a medical background, and should have been well aware of the dangers of Opium.

What was going on in New Mexico on January 6, 2012?

Dr. Dennis Trujillo (Assistant State Historian, NMSRCA) and his wife Beth Silbergleit (Manuscript Collections, CSR/UNM) prepare to whisk away birthday wishes at the Grand Centennial Ball in Santa Fe, New Mexico.

Precious trinkets and sparkly things…

Well- it is now after midnight (again)… It feels like today, but it was really yesterday that I finally got around to finishing something special. A couple of months ago, my sister called me to tell me that our aunt (my godmother Rita) had given her several jewelry boxes which once belonged to my maternal grandmother Corina Valdez y Brisol de Garcia. When she was alive, my grandma treasured these things. I remember begging her to play in the room where she kept them when I was just a little girl. I was so excited to hear that my sister had the boxes. We made a date, and she, my mom, and I got together to go through everything.

I am not joking when I say my grandma literally had pounds of trinkets, jewelry, and other little relics. It took us several hours to look through it and our backs started hurting. As we sat there and looked at everything, we would remember things my grandma would wear at different times of the year. It made us happy and sad to think about the memories each piece brought back. Together we decided that it was unfair for the three of us to keep everything. We decided that we should share her memory with everyone in our family. That day we broke the massive amount of jewelry into smaller bags to give away. She would have wanted everyone to have something to remember her by. That was a couple of months ago. The bags have been sitting and waiting for me to deliver them. Last night I realized that I would be going to the 35th wedding anniversary of my uncle and aunt. This was the perfect place to give the gifts away. So I wrote a little poem, and a note to go along with each keepsake.

The first table I visited was the table of my aunt Mary. It was her party, and it was only right that I visit with her first. As I approached her table, I realized she was in tears. I told her “why are you crying? You are supposed to be having fun today!” She simply said “I always cry.” Then her daughter-in-law Monica turned to me and said “she is sad because your grandma could not be here.” Amazed and excited, I reassured my aunt that her mother was indeed there with her, and with all of us. I took out a special box that I had bought just for my aunt. She looked at the box, and then opened it. In the box rested the jewelry of her mother. I told her “don’t cry aunt Mary, she is here- see?!” It turns out that it was indeed the perfect day, and the perfect time to complete this undertaking. It was on the day my aunt really needed it. Everything happens for a reason.

We went on to have a great time. It was so fun: we danced, and danced, and danced (until my feet hurt); and laughed, and laughed, and laughed (until my stomach hurt); and yelled (until I lost my voice for a bit); and ate (until I almost burst); and visited, hugged, and reminisced (until we had to leave). It was so nice to see everyone. There was one special person missing- my brother (who was hunting). All the twins were together, except for he and my sister. Believe it or not, there are three sets of twins on my mom’s side of the family: Jamie and Jackie; Thomas and Laura; and Juana and Rita. My cousin Toby, his wife Monica and all the others who helped plan the 35th did such a good job.

There was a short note inside the keepsake jewelry packages which read…

“As all of you know… Grandma Corine absolutely loved jewelry. Recently Aunt Rita asked us to go through three large jewelry boxes grandma kept and treasured. Each day she would sport something from her extravagant collection of sparkly things! It took several hours, but my sister, my mom, and I sat down and went through the entire collection. It was bitter sweet remembering things she would wear. Many of the pieces brought back memories of her. Her love of bingo was also evident! In memory of her, we thought it was a good idea to share a bag of jewelry with each of you as a keepsake. Some pieces kept for you, and maybe some for your children. This is what grandma would have wanted. Even if you will not wear it, save the jewelry, and think of her each time you see it.”
***Sincerely- Laura, Gloria & Felicia

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A Smile is the Best Memory…

Today is my maternal grandma’s birthday. Corina Valdez y Brisol de Garcia would have been 95 years old today. I share a birth month with both my paternal and my maternal grandmothers. In honor of my grandma Corine, a fellow Virgo, here is a memory…

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*********** I am fourteen again. We are making the usual drive from Pojoaque to Santa Fe, on the way to visit my grandma. The evening sun is setting as we pass the Santa Fe Opera and make our way up the hill. It is Christmas Eve. My mom played holiday music at home, and it still moves softly out of my mouth. I am excited to see my cousins, aunts, and uncles again. Even though I feel we live so very far, we still feel a closeness. The further we get into Santa Fe, the more I anticipate seeing my grandmother smile brightly and open her gifts. I am sure she will like what I got for her. I wrapped it myself. We now embark on the short drive up to the last driveway on Navajo Drive. The road to the home of my grandma marks the intersection of that and Jay Street. As soon as we drive up, I hear rancheras and laughter. Now I know we have arrived. Family is spread about. Some are inside, and some are out. I see her porch. It is the main place we gather. It is nice to see happy faces, and to receive warm greetings. There are so many of us, but we still take the time to greet one another. “Mis Christmas,” my Uncle Peps says cheerfully. We make our way to her door through the busy chattering on the porch. I am dying to try her food. I waited all day for this! When we walk in, she smiles at us. She stirs her posole. Tia Chench is cooking away as well. She is getting a pot of red chili ready. She takes her spoon and asks me if I would like to try it. “Of course,” I say. Nearby the cinnamon in my Uncle Donald’s spiked nog tickles my nose. He has such an attention to detail. He uses intricate little cups, a fancy bowl and ladle to serve up his yearly concoction. He takes a cup and gives my mom some to try. “Tell me what it needs,” he says. I can hear her smack her lips with a voiceless yum! He knows that means it needs nothing more, and nothing less. Laura, Tom and I head for the tree to deposit our gifts. We have traveled this path, just as all the others for years. My grandma has carpet which is worn by the steps of those who care for her. She comes into the living room to talk with everyone, and nestles into her usual spot. She asks us “how do you like my tree?” The little tree peers out her picture window into the night with lights, sparkles, and love. The tree looks just as beautiful as it did last year. My uncles look at it proudly, for of course they played a part in the tradition. Though the lights are small and blue, they fill her living room with radiant warmth. For my grandma, my uncle has again recreated the manger scene. The scene is complete with baby Jesus, and the angels looking down on him. The clouds are soft and silky, so I quickly touch them before any one can catch me. After we eat, we gather in the living room around my grandma and her sister. My uncles tease my grandma about already knowing what she is getting in each present because she has taken a peek! Everyone laughs. The more family she sees, the more she smiles. She lifts each gift to show everyone, and says thanks.
It is a happy time.***********

This is one thing I remember about going to visit my grandma when she was alive. I miss times like this. I miss her. I miss her little chuckle, her food, her stories, and taking her birthday presents. What I miss most of all is her smile.

Happy Birthday Emily…

Yesterday was the birthday of my paternal grandmother. Emily Ortiz y Garduno de Lujan turned 80 years young. I stayed with my grandma when I was a little girl, and she showed me many creative arts. To this day, she still paints, does straw applique, writes poetry and songs, teaches art classes, and does other artistic things. I was down in Pojoaque (my home town), for her birthday celebration. My grandma was like a lil movie star taking her photo with a line of peeps. I had so much fun, and hadn’t seen some of my cousins in many years. All of my uncles, and my dad have great personalities (and are big comedians), so I really laughed it up.

I also had a blast in the “Tech Corner” (of course ). That’s what my family was calling the area where all the geeks were sitting! Where else would I be?? With WiFi stealing the air, I schooled my lil sis, and one of my cousins from Albuquerque on the finer points of backdoor access to servers which house musical goods! It felt kinda good to show a couple of youngsters that I could bring it! Haha… Let’s just say they will be ditching the iTunes Store now . There were smart phones, an Apple top, computers, and an iPad eating the wave sequence. My lil sis Kate was hittin’ the Skype with my Aunt Marlene, the kids were hittin’ the video games, and my pops and uncles were textin’, emailin’, and showing me King of the Cage photos! Now that’s what I like to see… It was a good time!

This month, I will be honoring all of my grandparents, as today is officially Grandparent’s Day. I share a birth month with both my paternal, and my maternal grandmothers.