Failure: Misadventures of a Hopeful CRM through the Eyes of Deadpool

Nothing can make you feel smaller than failure. Failure can make you feel so small that you forget about those things that make you big. Our success somehow gets lost in the hopelessness. We all fail. It’s part of life. Even though we are all alike in that sense, our individual failures can make us feel alone…left to absorb the pains in solitude. Though it is heart wrenching, without failure we couldn’t appreciate success.

“Failure is the state or condition of not meeting a desirable or intended objective, and may be viewed as the opposite of success.” I guess if becoming a CRM was easy, everyone I know would be one. Like Steve Austin recently said on an episode of Broken Skull Ranch… “you didn’t think this was gonna be easy did ya?” I didn’t think it would be easy, but I felt some confidence after studying really hard. I failed my first exam…but I tried.

There is no excuse for failure. I will own that. I will say that I read every book. I studied every night and took a ton of notes. I have over 15 years of experience and determination. I still failed! It was upsetting. It seemed like the test didn’t cover much of what I read and in all fairness, the educational focus isn’t really what I expected. Ratios, percentages, formulas, budget and management theory likely got me. I haven’t had the heart to really look at the results. 

I went from being sad, to being mad, to feeling sorry for myself and now I’m trying to reclaim the negative energy for positive use. Maybe I’m not as smart as I thought? Maybe I’m just good at lifting things up and putting them down? Maybe the main reason I went into this was the wrong reason? Maybe I should become a professional poet and live off the grid in an Earth friendly home? I did get 45 likes and counting, 3 reblogs and 2 comments on my free verse poem The Dark Horse. I wrote it last night on a creative study break. 

Nothing can make me feel smaller than failure. Failing makes me feel so worthless that I forget about my worth. I somehow felt lost in the hopelessness until my son saw me with tears in my eyes and said… “don’t worry about it. You’re a great mom.” Yes!! I am! Thank you son. We all fail. It is a hard part of life. Though we collectively experience failure, when we are faced with personal or professional failure, it is important to remember how we are successful.

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